Monday, May 19, 2008

Do You Understand Your Partner?

Do You Understand your partner? This looks a little different kind of question, isn't it? Because all of us think that we understand our partner. Is that true for all of us? What is the truth?
What all do we need to know about a person to feel that we understand them? Let us list out. Food habits, clothing choice, hobbies, emotional response, values, ambitions, behavior, mental strength, IQ, EQ and others. How much do you know about behavior response of your partner? Let us not talk about everyday behavior but how do they behave during extraordinary circumstances. For example, if a burger enters the house at night, what will be your partner's reaction? They will feel frightened? They will go and confront the burglar? They will try to catch the burglar or they will try to kill?
We can raise many such questions and try and think if we know the answer. Suppose your partner is dressed in their best clothes and is attending a party. Somebody spills a liquid on his or her clothes by mistake. How do you think they will react? Can you answer this? Think of different situations and answer them to know if you really understand your partner.
Knowing about likes and dislikes does not mean understanding. To understand means to know the values, the life goals and the priorities of a person. To understand means to know what incidences made what impacts on that person. To understand means - you will be able to predict the reaction of your partner at a crucial moment. Can you do that with surety?
In the beginning of our relationship, we all talk about good things of life. Our focus is more to please our partner. Our focus is to get more pleasure in their company. we never think about the underlying psychological behavior at that time. After the relationship develop little further, we find that many times we get baffled by what our partner does and vice-versa. Better understand leads to stronger relationship.

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